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Husbands and Wives, version 2
December 04, 2016
God has arranged for a marriage to be between a man and a woman. Jesus said that the two shall be one flesh. This means that each partner in the marriage is a part of the whole, and what one does affects the other. Men should cherish and nourish their wives, showing them honor, recognizing their value. Wives should revere their husbands, holding them up and praising them. Man is given the role of head of this relationship. This does not mean the wife is a slave, a servant or a second-class citizen. She is bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh. The two shall be one. - Bernie Parsons
Husbands and Wives v2
a sermon by Bernie Parsons
Presented to the Globe church of Christ on 12-04-2016
Presented to the Load church of Christ on 12-11-2016
In my last lesson I showed God as the ultimate authority for our
doctrines. I showed a scriptural line of authority consisting of God >
Christ > Man > Woman. All those below God are to obey the commandments
and instructions of God. There is a reason that we call Him Almighty.
In that lesson I also pointed out that God has appointed men to teach in
the assemblies of the church, but women are to remain silent. Because of
that, some think that God is making women second-class citizens. Others
blame Apostle Paul. Some even blame me for being out-of-date.
Ephesians 5:22 “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto
the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head
of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be
to their own husbands in every thing.”
Paralleling our study last time regarding the line of
authority, we see that the wife is to be to her husband as she is to the
Lord.
Ephesians 5:25 “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also
loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by
the word,
27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having
spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and
without blemish.
28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth
his wife loveth himself.
29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and
cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be
joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.”
A husband is to love his wife in the same way that Christ loved the
church – he should be willing to die to save her, if necessary. His love
for her should match the love he has for himself. He nourishes her –
that is, helps her to grow and mature. He also cherishes her, or warms
and fosters her. He does not suppress her or regard her as less than
himself – instead, he builds her up. The two are one flesh – when he
improves her life, he improves his own.
As Christ and His called-out are one body, with Christ as the head, so
are husband and wife one body, with the husband as the head. Because of
this truth, a man leaves behind his parents and is joined or “adhered,
or glued, to” his wife, as the Greek word suggests.
Ephesians 5:32 “This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ
and the church.
33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even
as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband."
The man is to love and esteem his wife, and she is to be in awe of, or
reverence, her husband. With the woman raising up her husband, her head,
he in turn lifts her up through helping her to grow and be productive.
They both benefit from this mutual relationship.
Apostle Paul distilled this same message into brief comments to the
Colossians.
Colossians 3:18 “Wives, submit yourselves unto
your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.
19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.”
Here, the Greek word for “submit” comes from a compound root word which
means to “arrange under” or “appoint under”, or to subject oneself to,
or submit. Christian women are to willingly submit to their husbands as
their heads. Similarly, the husbands are not to be sharp or acrid – that
is, bitter – against their wives. Instead, they are to love them and
hold them in esteem. Recall that the two shall be one. A husband holding
his wife in high regard and love, helps himself.
And we have the following instructions from the apostle Peter.
1 Peter 3:1 "Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands;
that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by
the conversation of the wives;
2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.”
Peter uses similar language as the Apostle Paul. The word “subjection”
is again from the same Greek compound root word which means “arranged or
appointed under”. In spiritual matters, as we saw last time, women are
to draw their authority for doctrine from God. Yet, in material matters,
wives are to submit to their husbands. In this way, a believing woman
can obey God spiritually but submit to her husband’s leadership in
material matters if he is not a believer.
Peter asserts that a believing woman who is submissive may convert her
unbelieving husband who notes her life is one of righteousness and
obedience to God, while honoring her husband.
1 Peter 3:3 “Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of
plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not
corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in
the sight of God of great price.”
As we studied previously, believing women are to be adorned properly,
not putting undue emphasis on elaborate hair styles, or expensive
jewelry and clothing. Rather, she is to decorate her inward self,
reflecting a woman who subjects herself to the commandments of God.
1 Peter 3:5 “For after this manner in the old time the holy women also,
who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their
own husbands:
6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are,
as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.”
Peter calls upon ancient righteous women as a witness to the
contemporary women of his time. Holy women who trust in God have always
adorned themselves in righteousness. Those ancient women willingly
subjected themselves to their husbands. Peter points out that Sara
called Abraham, “Lord” – from the Greek meaning “lord, or master” as the
one in charge, not out of fear of harm but out of respect and honor for
the one that God has appointed to be her head.
1 Peter 3:7 “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to
knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and
as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not
hindered."
Husbands are to treat their wives with dignity, showing them honor,
recognizing their value. Remember, the two shall be one. This is clearly
not a master/slave relationship, nor one of owner/property, as some
professed Christians erroneously conclude.
Peter describes a relationship between a man who recognizes the value of
his beloved wife, takes care of her, and treats her with tenderness and
kindness; and, a woman who looks up to her husband, and lends him her
assistance and moral support. She submits to him.
In a world where men have to work hard to plow the fields, hunt for
game, tend to flocks, and take other actions requiring physical strength
and stamina, the women stand out as a weaker version of the human race.
The man realizes this, and treats her accordingly. He recognizes that
his wife plays a complementary role in their marriage – the two shall be
one flesh.
Feminism violates the natural order that God has established. Their
claims and attacks only work because we live in a lax, wealthy and
fairly protected society and economy. Should society revert to a
situation where hunting, plowing, flock tending and other physically
demanding work is once again required, feminism will disintegrate
because it is based on a false premise.
God’s way is the right way. Man – or woman – cannot improve upon it.
